I am speaking to you tonight
because he won’t.
4:30am and my mind won’t turn off
Words rolling in my head
Apologies, rebuttals, hurt met by silence
Gathering steam and momentum on their own
Absorbing the energy of imagined bile, manipulation
grow, multiply, expand
to things paradoxically rational and ugly
arguments I wish he would hear
before they get too loud
Time in darkness does not heal me
or allow me to find level ground
falling faster, faster
downhill in this torment.